Faerie Dust and Gossamer Wings

then he tagged along to the apartment we were staying. he wasn't much of a talker, he simply threw himself at persons who towered over him--which was practically all of us. some were scared of him. some simply didn't like him. i personally didn't enjoy being bothered, as minding him was the least of my concerns. but he kept on.

the following day, he had bathed, to everyone's liking. i wasn't the only one growing allergies.i was stern on the first day and mostly ignored him so he would not get near. not much to my delight, i actually progressed from the occasional nod or "yes" at whatever he was showing to patting his head. he always wore a wide grin.

i didn't look forward to hearing his voice when i was about to take a nap in the afternoon or to seeing him at the crack of dawn while my group was trying to discern onions from red eggs. but i did allow him to clamber on my mattress, sleep on my arm, crawl all over me, and talk to me (even if he had well rolled over grass littered with cow dung earlier). yes, i hugged him too.

we gave him whatever we ate, including the sinigang na bangus for dinner, since he could already remove milkfish bones. i was, in all my selfishness, unwilling to debone one for him. he tagged along some of the hosted lunches, after promising that "indi siya magsabad (he won't misbehave)." most of the time, he was hanging from someone's back. he'd usually call out our names, ate this, kuya that, in that funny accent we enjoyed mimicking. he already even picked a mommy and a daddy from the group.

on friday, we didn't let him come with us to the beach because no one would mind him. when we arrived at around 7pm, we learned that he had waited for us the whole day. on our last day in antique, one of my teammates reprimanded him then he hit another with a pillow. i raised my voice at him and told him that while we don't spank, we don't tolerate misbehavior either. he called one of us "bad." later, he and "bad" girl talked. "bad" girl had a red nose and watery eyes afterwards. i realized that perhaps, it wasn't about him inching his way into hearts but about how much space we made room in there for him.

we were to leave for manila that same day . i kissed him on the forehead and picked him up. i cradled him in my arms until he was sleepy. then the jeep arrived and we all clambered up the vehicle and said goodbye. pastor richard said, "toto, pabilin lang ta nga duwa (let's just stay here, the two of us)."

we called him ga-a, one of his nicknames. he is also called beethoven, after the popular dog in the movies. he is also named jeboy. he is ten years old. his father works at a nearby vulcanizing shop, who squanders most of his meager earnings on liquor. the versions vary--some say he has two other siblings, others say there are five of them.

one story goes that once, when he was being fed by the pastor, he asked if he could take the food to his sister, who was in the hospital. one night, another tale says, when his father was drunk and sprawled on the street, he took a flashlight and used it to scare the dogs that began sniffing his father--although another version says that he stoned the dogs away instead.

what some of us did see was his father approaching the church and beckoning, with only his finger pointed at the child. ga-a obliged, shivering. some saw the bruises afterwards.

Most of the following posts are dated as far back as June this year. Haha.

"welcome home!" lauren greeted when kuya ian and i finally arrived, loaded with a mattress, an electric fan, a stroller bag stuffed with clothes and a large plastic bag packed with my toiletries basket, my bible and my journal, a couple of sandals and my tiny gqcci bag.

that i have a new place i'll be calling home is just starting to sink in. the place looked larger than the last (the first too) time i checked it out. i've already sensed that i'd be true to my family name--probably in the same way that kuya ebet's family name (nacion) is a meaningful coincidence. among the perks? getting to office first -- the first i ever managed to do so in my seven month employment period. and exercise too! i'll get to do a lot of walking to save fare -- some of the rides are really too short, taking them is absurd if i have the  luxury of time.

i am just starting to make myself comfortable, though i don't think it would be that difficult. i'm rather excited to get myself my first hanging closet, a hamper, and a new pillow. parang bata. i'm loving the silence. i heard the birds twittering this morning; there are birds in the area! pure joy. i thought i'd miss it once i move out of the center (though i don't have view of the sky anymore; which is alright since our bedroom is painted blue. close approximate :) )

and there are cats that settle on the ledge in front of the house. one of them has different colored eyes -- one blue, the other green. and i'm the shortest person in the house at 5'3. lauren seems seven feet to me, haha! i don't know how many years will pass before i call another place home again. but finally getting to settle in one place permanently is not that important anymore; as steven curtis chapman would put it, we're not home yet :)

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i was lying in bed, knowing that i'd drop off in a few minutes, and thought of my favorite food. i had just munched on calamares being sold at the corner. i found the stall while walking home (i was unusually early last night at around 8) and bought a couple of rings.

after dinner, i returned for more. i was back at the cozy home i share with two more people, clambered upstairs, and stretched on my bed -- a mattress i had borrowed, spread on the floor. i stared at our light blue walls, at the white ceiling. the player to my right was blaring some mid-90s music. it had just rained so it was rather cool in the room. then i enumerated my favorite food:

1. causeway siomai (any other authentic chinese restaurant will do);

2. tahong (either sauteed in garlic a la kuya jireh or baked a la ate mikay);

3. sidewalk calamares;

4. nilaga. beef or pork bones are the best; the meat clinging to the bones are perfect. with ginger. nothing beats home.

5. alimango!!! just basted to perfection. then i dozed to blissful sleep.